Rest easy world. I can now check off one of my life goals. And no one got hurt in the process!
You see, if given the chance (or if I made the chance), I hoped to use the Large Hadron Collider for my own selfish experiment. I would stuff funk in one end and electronic music at the other. In the middle I would put the John Hughes Too Cool For School box set. I’d then put my goggles on (safety first) and flip the switch. The result, at least in my mind, would bring the world the most awesome retro sounding electronic funk on a level never before achieved. Or maybe it would just end up smelling like burnt toast and I’d be arrested.
Thankfully (for society) and sadly (for me) I didn’t have to do that.
The brothers Perlick-Molinari, hailing from Brooklyn, NY by way of Milwaukee, WI, because they’re so similar, have released Love Is Dangerous under the name French Horn Rebellion. Because, let’s face it nothing says “We tear apart the very fabric of time and space on which funk, disco, dance and electronic music exists” like a brass instrument wearing a baseball cap and Andrew Dice Clay gloves.
Love Is Dangerous, the EP, consists of two tracks. Four, including the two remixes of track one. “Love Is Dangerous” (Ft. The Knocks and Fat Tony) is a fantastic track that has me longing for WWE like entrances to Tron’s Disc Battles. The gold cloak, woven with grooves you could get lost in if you didn’t have a map, sparkles with rhinestones, gleaming from the soulful lyrics, as it trails the large figure standing on platforms with goldfish in the soles. The pyrotechnics fire with enough awe, even those two French robot guys would look up from their beats.
The track is remixed twice (Chrome Canyon Remix & FHRekles Remix), each one as good as the next. But in between the remixes lies the surprise. “Cold Enough” Ft. Jody Watley, Yes, “Don’t You Want Me” Watley, embraces your inner harmony as it sways with rich layers and rocks within that gene that gets your feet moving. For sake of simplicity, we’ll henceforth refer to that as “The French Horn Gene.” And in case you missed it, I did just say Jody Watley. The Grammy Winning Pop/R&B voice spins a web on the track that catapults it into the stratosphere of entertaining. It is as if the two were meant for each other.
A sound like the French Horn Rebellion is rare. It is not in their production or vision or song choice, but in every beat they form. They have remixed Sleigh Bells, MEN, Two Door Cinema Club and Savoir Adore and I cannot foresee them slowing down. And I just have to say, their remix of Savoir Adore’s “Dreamers” is truly top-notch.
If you like to move and smile, perhaps at the same time, this is for you. But as far as this writer is concerned, they’re in a class all their own. And no one had to risk turning the world into a black hole to get it.